I graduated on Dec. 19 with my second Master's degree. It was a chilly day in Beaumont, TX and I rushed to get into the auditorium. We were divided into rooms based on the degree you were receiving and your last name. In my room, we had a lot of no-shows so we all just kinda sat around and talked.
As we were lining up, a woman came rushing in. She was running late and made it just in time. Her hair was all the way to her knees and she was carrying a wrinkled graduation gown and chugging a cold bottled coffee.
It turns out this long haired woman, Virginia, was full on drunk. At 9:30 a.m. Turns out that Starbucks drink was not just coffee. Virginia proceeded to tell us, in great detail, stories of her family, her stresses through grad school and other personal problems.
As luck would have it, Virginia sat next to me at the graduation. Our last names are not even close in the alphabet, but because of all the no-shows, she was my neighbor. The ceremony was in the opening phase when Virginia pulled up her graduation gown, hiked up her skirt and pulled a cell phone out of her thigh-highs. We were strictly told not take cell phones, but Virginia found a way.
It was time to go across the stage. (By the way, M got it on video and will post it soon.) As we were waiting in line to go across, some of our professors were sitting near the line. They were shaking the hands of the graduates and giving us a, "Congratulations!" as we walked by. But not Virginia. She reached over and did a full on hug. The kind of hug you get from a drunk relative at Christmas. And she didn't just hug one professor, she hugged them all- even the ones that were not from the education department.
Needless to say, Virgina made that graduation the funniest one yet... and thankfully, I do have a basis for comparison. There were other ceremonies that were more sentimental, like the first Master's where I sat next to one of my sweetest friends. Or my Bachelor's graduation when my brother yelled, "Way to go Munchkin" and everyone laughed. But this one, with drunk Virginia, was the funniest. Thanks, Virginia!
After the ceremony, I joined my family and M for lunch. The graduation was actually really short and didn't last all afternoon like some ceremonies. During lunch, I told my family about Virginia and we all laughed. I couldn't help but wonder what Virginia was having for lunch.
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2 comments:
What about the graduation when your friend slid down the stairs on her stomach in front of thousands of people? Remember that one?
L,
I thought we weren't telling about that one! But since you brought it up, expect a post very soon. :)
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