I went to at a training session in a different building. The training session consisted of five whole days but they spread those days out over 2 weeks. During our daily sessions, we would get 15-minute breaks. And without fail, the guys always commented on how long it took us girls to get in and out of the bathroom. So, I decided to write this post for them. Especially Mr. Know-It-All Guy from Garland.
First of all, it is most important to note that the main time suck in a women’s restroom are all those fancy automatic things that have become the norm in public restrooms. Allow me to explain that along with the other factors that cause those looong lines. And since this is bathroom talk, it may get ugly.
When a woman walks into a public restroom, there are four things that must be in place before we can commit to one stall.
1. There cannot be anything, and I mean anything, on the toilet seat or floating in the bowl. Why? Because we actually have to sit down, naked on the seat. We could potentially sit on something grody or something grody could splash up on us. Eww!
2. There must be toilet paper in the stall.
3. If toilet seats covers are available, there must be some in the container.
4. The door must lock. Can you imagine sitting there naked and someone pushes the door open? Not pretty.
If any of those items are not in place, we immediately back out of the stall and try the next one. Once we are committed to a stall, we have to remove every item of clothing from the waist down. And we have to be careful that our clothing (at knee level) doesn’t touch the toilet. Also, there is a very delicate amount of time between placing the toilet seat cover on the seat and then sitting down. If you place the cover on too soon, it can slide right into the bowl. Once everything is in order, we do our business and then proceed to get dressed.
With the invention of automatic flushing came yet another thing to add to the already crammed timing in the restroom. There are 4 basic problems with flushing.
1. The automatic flusher sometimes does not flush. So you have to stand there and wiggle around in hopes of setting off the sensor. If that does not work, you have to get a piece of toilet paper and hold it while pushing the flusher button.
2. The automatic flusher goes off too early. So you have to jump up as fast as possible in hopes of avoiding the unintentional bidet.
3. There is no automatic flusher – it is the old school knob. You have to get a piece of toilet paper and hold it while flushing or you can flush with your shoe. Just kick up that foot!
4. The flusher is broken. That is a whole other nightmare that has to be dealt with because the ladies waiting in line will know that you are the one who left a potty present.
Once things have been flushed and we are dressed, we exit the stall and proceed to the sink. We have to wash our hands with soap and dry them off. There are four things that can go wrong here.
1. The automatic soap and water dispensers are not only picky, but also greedy. You have to hold your hand in just the right spot so the sensor will give you one tiny squirt of soap. So you have to keep at it until you get enough soap. The automatic water dispensers are designed to conserve water. But you simply cannot get the soap off your hands with the small amount of water they provide. So you could be there a while trying to get the sensor to give you just enough water to rinse off.
2. The automatic paper towel dispensers do not recognize you and will not give you a paper towel. Sometimes you have to stand there and wiggle your wet hand around the sensor until some paper scoots out of the machine.
3. The automatic dryers are a good thing. Good for the environment and good for the clean up crew. However, they are disgusting because water pools on the floor just below them. They take a really long time and they still don’t do a good job of drying your hands. Other ladies are in line waiting for the dryers so we abort mission and exit the bathroom. And can’t help but squirm when touching the already wet door knob.
4. The automatic dryers are broken and/or there are no paper towels. This is particularly annoying if you notice it after having washed your hands. You gotta do the “dog shake off” and hope for the best.
So you see, a lot of the delay in women’s restrooms is caused by timing – it has to be just right. The automatic things that were installed in hopes of moving the process along have only made it worse. Plus, the whole issue of getting fully undressed then redressed is a problem… especially if you’re wearing tights or leggings.
Oh and we didn’t even get into hair/makeup checks and the fragile subject of “that time of the month.” I will spare you. But just know that these issues are just a part of what we deal with in a public restroom and that’s just the way it is. Now pass me some toilet paper from under the stall wall; I’m out.
